Post by Manovan Marrowsteel on Jul 28, 2006 3:59:28 GMT 1
I just had to copy it. I laughed through all of it.
---
It has occured to me that the increasing amount of time I spend on Azeroth may be blurring the already heavily drunken line to reality, as became apparent during a party I attended last night.
So here I am, at this party, at the bar, trying to explain to the barman that all I want is a 20 stack of water, when the alluring eyes of a female party attendant drew me away with an invite to conversation.
After brief introduction we fell into typical shallow party banter, during which my eyes wandered to better inspect her gear.
Me: Nice pants. Where'd you get them?
She: Got them in the city
Me: Org?
She: Err no, GAP
Me: GAP? That a new instance?
She: Inst...what?
Me: Meh, nevermind. Are they at least epic?
She: Um, they're Levis
Me: I mean are they purple?
She: No, they're blue, can't you see that?
Me: Oh ok. I'm more interested in mail anyway
She: Oh... are you gay?
Me: Excuse me?!
Somehow her strange answers confused me, and I began to realize she was a little odd. But I was determined to bed her, so the conversation continued:
She: So now what? Are we going to my place or yours?
Me: Dunno. Where is your stone set?
She: My what?
Just then this rather drunken and smelly pinky shouted something in my ear: "You got a problem? Get away from my girlfriend!"
Of course I asked her "Is this ally yours?", but before she could answer he was entering melee range very fastly. I could already taste the honor reward
2 hits and he was down, and I was a little irritated to see that the server was slow on updating my honor kills as usual. At least he wasn't a civilian no DK to worry about.
It was then that 4 players wearing blue tabards entered the scene. They seemed to think they were pretty important, for a guil who's name and emblem I have never encountered before.
Me: Police? Never heard of you, are you new on the server?
Cop: You some kind of funnyman?
Me: Shaman actually
Cop: Shaman?
Me: Zug zug
Cop: I think you`re gonna have to come with us
Me: Oh yeah? Where to?
Cop: Downtown
Me: New to me. Is that a 5er or are you gimps bringing friends?
Cop: Follow me please
They acted like total lowbies, but for lack of better things to do and I didn't feel like logging yet for the night, I went along
Me "Got party already? Invite please"
Cop: Just follow us
Me: Ok. On auto while I go potty
When we got there they asked me to sit down.
"I'm full", I said, "Just buff and lets go"
But they got rude with me and insisted I sit. I didn`t feel like rushing into a new 5er instance on my own, so I went along for now.
Cop "I'd like to see your ID"
Me "Sure thing. Trade me"
Cop "..."
Me "Well?"
Cop "What do you do for a living?"
Me "My profession? Herbalist/Alchemist, both maxed out"
Cop "What do you do exactly?"
Me "I don't have all the recipes yet but I can brew you up something for any occasion."
I overheard him whisper something to his guildie about checking my home for narcotics. I told them I carry all my mats on me in case I need pot on the go
Cop "What were you doing at the club?"
Me "I got tons of stuff in the bank and I was hoping to sell some off to make room"
Cop " Do you want to contact anyone before we put you in a cell?"
Me "Yeah, Veni"
Cop "Is that your lawyer?"
Me "No, my leader"
Cop "Your what? And what are you going to tell him?"
Me "That I may be late for scholo"
Cop "Put this guy with the other nutjobs in the drunk tank"
They shoved me in another room containing only another player, a troll by the looks of it.
Me "What are you in here for?"
Troll "They picked me up in the woods trying to skin some wolves"
Me "You a cook?"
Troll "No, skinner/leatherworker"
Me "You're a mage right? Can you whip me up some water?"
Troll "What would you need that in here for?"
Me "I just need to regen. Gonna HS to Org and get ready for scholo."
All in all it was a very odd evening. At least I found one person who understood me
---
It has occured to me that the increasing amount of time I spend on Azeroth may be blurring the already heavily drunken line to reality, as became apparent during a party I attended last night.
So here I am, at this party, at the bar, trying to explain to the barman that all I want is a 20 stack of water, when the alluring eyes of a female party attendant drew me away with an invite to conversation.
After brief introduction we fell into typical shallow party banter, during which my eyes wandered to better inspect her gear.
Me: Nice pants. Where'd you get them?
She: Got them in the city
Me: Org?
She: Err no, GAP
Me: GAP? That a new instance?
She: Inst...what?
Me: Meh, nevermind. Are they at least epic?
She: Um, they're Levis
Me: I mean are they purple?
She: No, they're blue, can't you see that?
Me: Oh ok. I'm more interested in mail anyway
She: Oh... are you gay?
Me: Excuse me?!
Somehow her strange answers confused me, and I began to realize she was a little odd. But I was determined to bed her, so the conversation continued:
She: So now what? Are we going to my place or yours?
Me: Dunno. Where is your stone set?
She: My what?
Just then this rather drunken and smelly pinky shouted something in my ear: "You got a problem? Get away from my girlfriend!"
Of course I asked her "Is this ally yours?", but before she could answer he was entering melee range very fastly. I could already taste the honor reward
2 hits and he was down, and I was a little irritated to see that the server was slow on updating my honor kills as usual. At least he wasn't a civilian no DK to worry about.
It was then that 4 players wearing blue tabards entered the scene. They seemed to think they were pretty important, for a guil who's name and emblem I have never encountered before.
Me: Police? Never heard of you, are you new on the server?
Cop: You some kind of funnyman?
Me: Shaman actually
Cop: Shaman?
Me: Zug zug
Cop: I think you`re gonna have to come with us
Me: Oh yeah? Where to?
Cop: Downtown
Me: New to me. Is that a 5er or are you gimps bringing friends?
Cop: Follow me please
They acted like total lowbies, but for lack of better things to do and I didn't feel like logging yet for the night, I went along
Me "Got party already? Invite please"
Cop: Just follow us
Me: Ok. On auto while I go potty
When we got there they asked me to sit down.
"I'm full", I said, "Just buff and lets go"
But they got rude with me and insisted I sit. I didn`t feel like rushing into a new 5er instance on my own, so I went along for now.
Cop "I'd like to see your ID"
Me "Sure thing. Trade me"
Cop "..."
Me "Well?"
Cop "What do you do for a living?"
Me "My profession? Herbalist/Alchemist, both maxed out"
Cop "What do you do exactly?"
Me "I don't have all the recipes yet but I can brew you up something for any occasion."
I overheard him whisper something to his guildie about checking my home for narcotics. I told them I carry all my mats on me in case I need pot on the go
Cop "What were you doing at the club?"
Me "I got tons of stuff in the bank and I was hoping to sell some off to make room"
Cop " Do you want to contact anyone before we put you in a cell?"
Me "Yeah, Veni"
Cop "Is that your lawyer?"
Me "No, my leader"
Cop "Your what? And what are you going to tell him?"
Me "That I may be late for scholo"
Cop "Put this guy with the other nutjobs in the drunk tank"
They shoved me in another room containing only another player, a troll by the looks of it.
Me "What are you in here for?"
Troll "They picked me up in the woods trying to skin some wolves"
Me "You a cook?"
Troll "No, skinner/leatherworker"
Me "You're a mage right? Can you whip me up some water?"
Troll "What would you need that in here for?"
Me "I just need to regen. Gonna HS to Org and get ready for scholo."
All in all it was a very odd evening. At least I found one person who understood me
